My musing on Minimalism, and corporate America (or rather somehow walking away from it) has landed me where I am now- Formally separated from my career in wireless; remarried; stay at home Mom; stay at home Housewife. No ladder to climb; no sales to make. Childlike almost, dependent 100% on my husband and his work.
I am mostly in shock, and a bit depressed, at the number of people who ask me “What’s next?” “When will you go back to work?” “What do you want to do?”
I am blessed that all I need at the moment for my son and me is provided- home, food, clothing, safety. I do not desire a plaque on the wall telling me I was number one sales in the Northeast Market anymore. Who remembers anyway? The moment the award is presented, another month slips by and the sales and achievements I accomplished are eclipsed and forgotten. Along with it, the satisfaction of what I had done- selling a ton of wireless phones for a company to make a ridiculous amount of money off of.
I could go in a few directions at this point in the story- I can continue on my bitterness of the expectations of the world that I should be “doing” something. I can also continue on how the wireless industry is not all evil; it’s a business and it supports thousands of people and their lives with the service it provides.
In a way they are the same point– What am I doing? I can tell you what I am- I am a mother of one, and another on the way- so my focus revolves around encouraging my son to learn to read and a be a good little human; and also focused on eating as healthy as I can to grow another little human along the way. I am learning (slowly) how to be a wife again- this time around so insanely different from the last.
What are you “Doing”? What are you Accomplishing? What can you brag about? What trophies can you put on your wall to show the world that you ‘are’ something? Society is obsessed with growth, unfortunately to me, I feel the growth is for superficial measures that don’t last. At least, my accomplishments, I have found, disappeared like the morning dew. I acknowledge, I am in a position at this moment in life that I can question all this without the pressing worry of supporting myself and son on my own- so forgive me if I have come across as condescending. Even before meeting my husband, the gears were in motion to move on from my career and find something that required less time at work and more time with my child.
“But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.” Matthew 6:20 NIV